Is This a Review of the New My Bloody Valentine Album?
[Eds. Note: When Hanson sent in this review, we were confused. Surely if the long-awaited follow-up to My Bloody Valentine’s seminal 1991 album Loveless leaked, we would have heard, no? And yet, Hanson insists he’s heard the album. When we pressed him for a listen, Hanson claimed that an early morning energy drink accident had resulted in a failed hard drive, and that the blog on which he found the leak had disappeared. He’s stopped answering our emails, but continues to tweet.
While we don’t want to say we don’t believe him, we also cannot say we do. What is clear, however, is that he reviewed something, and ultimately (given that taste is subjective and that it’s impossible to figure out if what I call “blue” is really what you call “blue” or if what I call “red” is actually what you call “green”)… isn’t that what matters?]
Do you remember the 90s? More specifically, do you remember when that famous inventor (Google’s been down for the last few days so this review will be entirely based on memory, apologies but not really) announced that he’d finished his latest invention? He held press conferences; I think I saw it on 60 Minutes. What will it be?!, the public wondered. A flying car, a miracle, a way to turn salt water into water into Zima? And then the inventor unveiled his creation: The Segway. And people were like, “A scooter? Fuck you for having us pay attention to you.”
Kevin Shields remember the 90s. And while I can’t be certain that he was following the media-storm that surrounded the birth of a $15,000 toy that maxes out at 15MPH (though you can totally imagine him owning and riding one), he’s certainly internalized its lesson. Which is to say: the follow up to Loveless cannot be a Segway.
And yet. And yet and yet and yet and yet. How could it be anything but?
Given the amount of time and money and southern hemisphere imports that went into its creation, there was no way that Deeper, Redder, Still the Feeling could be terrible. But, at the same time, usually it’s not a good sign when an album takes 20+ years to finish. Often it means there’s a lack of ideas, overproduction, and just a general “this isn’t very good” vibe. What is surprising, then, is that it’s 2013 and the new My Bloody Valentine album is unequivocally great.